April252012

Ok, I’m sure most people have already seen this video of Brian McKnight’s foray into the “adult mixtape” genre, however I feel like it’s worth posting again for a couple reasons. First off, it makes me laugh much harder than it should. Secondly, I have so many questions and maybe someone out there can help me answer them.

If you’ve yet to see the youtube clip or hear the song, please watch it, but keep the volume down if you’re not by yourself, and have the mute button handy in case someone comes within earshot of you.

Now that you’re done watching it (and trying to untwist your brain, wondering how this could possibly be real), I’d like to make a few observations:

  • Seriously, is this real? There’s no way. We’re talking about the same Brian McKnight, right? Brian “Do I Ever Cross Your Mind?” McKnight? Brian “That one song where he counts all the ways he loves you” McKnight?
  • If I’m not mistaken, Brian McKnight is currently a DJ on a smooth jazz station here in LA. If he were to play this song at least once an hour there, it would actually be worth tuning in every now and then. As of now, the only thing 94.7 The Wave is good for is providing a soundtrack for crashing your car on the freeway because you fell asleep to Kenny G.
  • This is actually a pretty catchy song. Problem is, you can’t mindlessly sing it to yourself as you go about your business. I almost accidentally blurted out the chorus at the supermarket, which could have ended with me being tazed and then arrested for sexual harassment.
  • With the backlash, it would be sad if McKnight didn’t finish this album (and this song, particularly). If it comes to that, can we start a petition to have someone else finish it? R. Kelly? John Legend, perhaps?
  • Maybe people have been misinterpreting the lyrical content? We all jumped to the conclusion that this song was definitely about a guy boasting about his sexual prowess. But, what if this is actually a conceptual album? Maybe this track was a first person story from the point of view of the world’s creepiest and most unprofessional gynecologist?
  • Has anyone else suggested that this might all be an incredibly elaborate prank by Wayne Brady?
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