February 2009
52 posts
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January 2009
83 posts
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In Defense of Costco
There’s a lot of people that give Costco shit for hurting local businesses, promoting overindulgence, and playing a large part in the growing obesity problem (hellooooo 10 gallon vat of mayonnaise!). I certainly have my complaints about the place and the people you run into while there.
But to be fair, who else can you turn to when it’s lunchtime and you find yourself thinking,...
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Tumblr Gossip
Am I the only one who feels completely out of the loop when it comes to Tumblr drama [Tumbldrama?]? It’s not that I feel left out or anything. It’s just every so often a bunch of people start buzzing over some vague, Tumblr-related event and I end asking my dashboard, “Dude, what the fuck are you talking about?”
I guess in this case it’s a good thing I’m not in...
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“You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants won’t...”
– Calvin
Personally, my lucky underpants had palm trees on them. I had to retire them when someone pointed out to me that when your underwear is severely worn out and frayed with a huge rip in the ass, it’s technically not underwear anymore.
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“Today we were practicing saying certain words out loud to take away the...”
– My brother describing the first day in his Human Sexuality class
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Sorry, Wrong Number
Today, I’ve learned that nothing discombobulates me more than changing a phone so that I no longer have to dial 9 to get an outside line. It’s only lunchtime, and I’ve already made about a dozen calls to the wrong number and faxed who knows how many pages of confidential information to random people.
At this rate, by the end of the day I’ll be on the line with 911 asking,...
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WatchDepartment of Eagles - Sailing By Night
Tonight. 8:00. Troubadour.
There’s a slight chance that I might have an extra ticket. So if you’re interested in going, send me an e-mail asap and I’ll let you know if my friend flakes or not.
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Efficiency
I value sound logic and efficiency in the work place. It won’t make me jump for joy or do a happy dance, but it definitely irritates the hell out of me when it’s absent.
With that said, I just got off the line with someone who called to let me know that their boss just called them to call me to ask me to call their boss. So let’s recap here, instead of calling me directly this...
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I Like It!
Ever since the dashboard started showing us how many posts we’ve liked, I’ve started “liking” the hell out posts. It’s as if Tumblr is a game and I’m constantly trying to beat my high score.
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Inspirations While Asleep
Last night I had the most vivid dream I’ve had in a long time. In it, I was with a group of strangers that asked me several questions about life. They listened intently as I showered them with my knowledge and wisdom. After dispensing sage advice on happiness, relationships and the meaning of life, I received my final question. A young girl stood up, looked me in the eye and asked,...
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Archie Bell & The Drells - Tighten Up
Now...
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Missing From Tumblr v5.0
Or maybe I’m just dense and can’t figure this out…
But, does anyone know how to filter your dashboard to just show audio/picture/video posts? I loved being able to list all the recent audio posts in one convenient spot and just listen to all the songs in succession. But now, the closest I can get is to do a search for “song” or “music” via the new search...
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Post-Inauguration Chat With My Friend Tim, Who Is...
My Away Message: FORMER. PRESIDENT. BUSH.
Happy Obama Day!
Tim: Gloat. Gloat. Gloat.
Me: Celebrate. Celebrate. Celebrate.
Tim: He'll put gas in your car and pay your mortgage!
Me: BELIEVE.
Tim: I would send more mocking messages as well, but Alyssa is going to bed.
Me: ;-)
Tim: Therefore,
Me: Sleep well. Dream of PRESIDENT Obama.
Tim: I will leave you to your celebration and watch Clockwork Orange.
Me: I HOPE you enjoy the movie
Tim: hahah
Me: Don't CHANGE the channel.
Tim: ahahah
Tim: ok. I'm leaving.
Me: YES YOU CAN.
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With the inauguration done, I think now is a good...
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Hillary Clinton Mouthing Along To Presidential...
WASHINGTON—Network news cameras covering Barack Obama’s inauguration ceremony Tuesday captured Hillary Clinton silently moving her lips along with each word of the minute-long presidential oath of office. As she stood watching several yards from Chief Justice John Roberts, the former Democratic presidential candidate could be observed placing her left hand on a leather appointment book and...
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Hey guys,
Anybody know what time the inauguration starts? Thanks a lot!
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What I'm Doing With My Monday Afternoon
I’m writing formal letters of complaint to the editors of the following magazines:
Field and Stream
The Journal of the American Medical Association
Powerlifting USA
Highlights for Children
Trains Illustrated
How these publications can release their latest editions without a large and glorious picture of Barack Obama on the cover is tantamount to treason. The nerve of these people.
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Is SNL written by children?
It’s sad how terrible this show has gotten over the past few seasons. Literally every week, there’s a sketch where Will Forte just repeats a word over and over again in a stupid voice. Those make it to air! Can you imagine the stuff that had to be cut because it wasn’t as good?! Was there a sketch where someone just marched around in circles while making fart noises and...
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This Tumblr upgrade has left me utterly worthless...
I haven’t gotten anything done. Not a single thing. I’ve been staring at the new features all day like a baby that just got a new mobile installed over his crib. But instead of stuffed airplanes, seahorses or bumblebees, I’m staring at layouts, menus and naked pictures I found with the new search feature.
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Tumblr Crushes
6 out of my 9 Tumblr crushes are dudes…
Does that mean I’m Tumblgay?
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Damian Marley - All Night (feat. Stephen Marley)
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drned:
if i see that guy from those FreeCreditReport.com commercials out and about i’m going to fucking punch him in the fucking face.
I’ve been on a similar mission ever since I saw those commercials for the first time. Unfortunately, I’ve yet to find the guy. I figure it’s because he’s constantly working deadend jobs at kitschy pirate-themed restaurants and doing gigs...
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The Beatles - I’ll Follow The Sun
Sorry...
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“There’s a huge trust. I see it all the time when people come up to me and...”
– Dubya (Boston, Oct. 3, 2000)
With one week left to go the stupid quotes are a lot more enjoyable. It’s like being able to laugh at the incompetence of a boss after you’ve handed in your two week notice.
(via: Slate’s Top 25 Bushisms of All-Time) They parsed it down to just 25?...
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